Transcript: Interference Episode 12

Currently this text is a copy of our working script, not the exact text of the episode. It will be updated once we have transcripts prepared for every episode.

GENEVA

Jacq? Are you there?

JACQ

(eating pb&j) mm mm hmm I’m here.

GENEVA

Oh, are you eating something? I can wait.

JACQ

No, that’s okay. (clears throat) I’m done.

GENEVA

Great! So did you talk to that cop any more? Do you have any more news about the flumph?

JACQ

Yeah. I talked to the cop. He gave me temporary access to the park. And I hung out with the flumph. I still don’t understand what it’s saying, but I thought maybe we could figure out what language it’s speaking.

The thing is, it definitely understands me, so I have a feeling it might pick up my language before we can figure out what its is.

GENEVA

Well, I can try to help. I know a few other languages. What does it sound like?

JACQ

Uh. I talked to it for a while. It was really patient with me and it made sure I was getting the sounds right. I think that its using “Breathy h” as some kind of pronoun. Either I or we. ...and I’m pretty sure that the word “Quith” means cage. It kept saying it and moving around the cage and pointing to the bars.

GENEVA

Oh, well If you know words, then that’s quite useful. I don’t recognize the language though. If you want to wait for a bit I can see if I can find some language books.

JACQ

I don’t think so. Just put it on the list of things to do.

GENEVA

Alright then (scribbles note)

It seems to be healthy though? How are the cops treating it?

JACQ

I have no idea how to evaluate its health. I do get the impression that it enjoys talking to me, which is probably just because it's lonely. No one else is doing that.

GENEVA

Alright. That’s all good to know. (sighs)

So on my end of things I’m afraid that I haven’t found much. We have a lot of records, but that just makes them hard to sort through. Especially since many of them just offer a small hint about the worlds being connected. I’ve gone through a few records, and I’ve asked the people in charge of them for help looking for information on the portals from Earth instead of from Chel. I don’t really have any authority over them though, so if they think it’s a low priority, they might not look for a while.

In my own research, I’ve not found any reference to them being opened from Earth. Everything I’ve read says that this is a natural occurrence. The stars simply align, and a portal rips its way between the worlds adjoining them. No one I saw talking about it seemed to think otherwise.

JACQ

Okay, That theory certainly seems to be built on an assumption. Hm.

I have a side question though. Do you have magical means of doing research, or do you just have to dig through books? We have a lot of tools to help us here, but the process you’re describing seems very laborious.

GENEVA

Ooh that’s intriguing, what kind of--(interference)

JACQ

Hold on, you’re breaking up.

GENEVA

Oh that was weird. It’s been a while since--(more interference) ...we’ve been interrupted like that. I wonder if this means the connection is getting stronger again?

JACQ

… or it could just be changing. Hm. I have an idea.

GENEVA

What is it?

JACQ

(noises tbd) I’m going to see if I can get us connected on my phone, and head down to the park. That way we can see if the interference happens at the same time as something else. (phone button pressing noises)

GENEVA

Your phone? Why don’t you just record on your computer like normal?

JACQ

Too bulky, plus there’s no wi-fi down there, which I might need to keep our connection. Also, I might want to look something up. (beep beep beep) Also, my phone has a good camera on it.

GENEVA

I hope that they’re getting good data at the portal. It’s been a bit hectic here lately. Anyway, not important now. Let’s try this! I’m excited to see if anything is happening down there.

(jacq noises phone buttons)

JACQ

It’s not … (button button button)...working…(button button button) I can use the same app on my phone but it’s not connecting to you, just showing my own voice. (sigh) I guess I’ll lug the whole dang laptop then.

GENEVA

Hmm, so I don’t work on your phone? NEW DATA! You can still take it for pictures, though right?

JACQ

Yeah, I never put my phone down.

GENEVA

Never?

JACQ

(Jacq’s voice quality changes)

It’s kind of an exaggeration. But it’s never far.

GENEVA

Oh! That’s different. Am I on your phone now? Did you get it working?

JACQ

What?

GENEVA

Your voice. It sounds different. Um, less good maybe? I thought maybe because I was on your phone. It’s smaller right? Like a small computer. So I thought maybe I was on it now.

JACQ

Oh! No, I changed microphones because I definitely can’t bring my good one with me. SO now I’m just on my headset. You said something a little while ago.... (door opening and closing)

Oh I remember, you were confused about my phone. That actually ties back to what I think you were going to ask when the interference interrupted you.

GENEVA

(Jacq walking down stairs)

Um, oh right. You’d said something about tools of some kind. You have tools for doing research faster? I’m really intrigued by that. It’s such a pain going through all these documents, checking and checking them again when we get new things we want to reference them about.

(Jacq door opening and closing again walking down street ambient noise starts!)

If we’re lucky, someone remembers a bit of information from a document that they read before that’s relevant, but if not then we just have to slog through everything until we find something.

JACQ

There’s nothing magical to help with that?

GENEVA

No? I mean... there are ways to read things faster? Is that what you mean?

JACQ

No. I am basically talking about the way we organize information here. We’ve talked a lot about computers--

GENEVA

Your magic boxes, yes.

JACQ

(chuckling) Right. While at some point somebody has to read and, uh... transcribe information, especially old information, once it’s on a computer the person using it can typically retrieve information from it using search terms.

GENEVA

So you just say “hey computer! Find all instances of humans starting portals,” and it will find those?

JACQ

Not exactly. They can’t handle queries that complex, and you interface with a keyboard, not your voice, but essentially it would be like picking up a book and telling it to show you all instances of the world “human.”

GENEVA

Ooh! That sounds really useful. I wonder if you could do that with magic. Some kind of divination magic perhaps? That’s really not my specialty.

JACQ

Yeah, it’s really great. And then we have the internet which ties... I don’t know. Probably millions of books together.

GENEVA

Wow.

JACQ

That’s why sometimes when we’re talking, you’ll hear a lot of clicking and then I’ll know something that I didn’t know before.

GENEVA

...hmm, so I don’t work on your phone, but I do work on your computer. And your computer is where the internet is?

JACQ

The internet...This is normally something I would look up, but I’m walking down the road. My computer and phone can both access the internet. But it doesn’t live there or anything.

GENEVA

Hmm but if you access us both through the computer, maybe I can access it from your computer!

Open internet! (clicking sounds, vocally imitating a keyboard) Open sesame? (slight interference)

JACQ

(laughs) There may actually be a way for that to work, but I don’t actually know what that is. But it’s PROBABLY not saying “open sesame.”

GENEVA

Hmph. Well I thought it was worth a try. (She makes a few more clicky sounds)

AGENT STEVE

Excuse me miss, this area’s off limits. I’m going to need you to turn around.

JACQ

Christ, Steve. You know who I am. (beat) Ugh, fine, here’s my ID. (beeping noise rfid scanner) Now can I come in?

AGENT STEVE

I guess that checks out. Go on in.

GENEVA

Bye Steve!

JACQ

He can’t hear you.

GENEVA

So what does it look like? Is anything different?

JACQ

Uh, not at the moment. Let’s just talk for awhile and see if anything happens.

GENEVA

Sure! Um, so what were you eating earlier? Anything good?

JACQ

Oh it was just a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. It was fine.

GENEVA

And how about your mother? How is she?

JACQ

She’s doing fine. My parents are actually on vacation right now, and I am watching their cat. It actually used to be my cat, but--

GENEVA

What is that noise?

JACQ

What noise?

GENEVA

It’s mmm it’s like speech, but not one I understand. Kind of whispery and guttural? Oh! Is it the flumph? Is the flumph talking to you?

JACQ

Nope. Wait... Is the flumph talking to you?

GENEVA

I don’t know? Maybe? You don’t hear it?

JACQ

I don’t. Let me ask. (She takes a couple of steps)  Hey buddy. Are you talking to my friend?

(pause)

It’s pointing at my computer. I think yes.

GENEVA

Oh well, hello there personage Flumph. I’m Geneva. I guess you’re probably from the planet Chel, which is where I am. I’m sorry I can’t understand you, but I will work on rectifying that. Meanwhile, is there anything weird happening around here? I mean anything that you’ve seen recently?

JACQ

*pauses* Is it still talking to you.

GENEVA

It’s saying something but I can’t understand it. Is it doing anything?

JACQ

Yes It’s definitely reacting to you. It’s changing colors and-- (crackeldy interference followed by a big burst of thunder and sudden howling winds)

GENEVA

Jacq! Jacq! Can you hear me? What’s going on? There’s a lot of noise. (more interference and a quieter thunder)

JACQ

(sounds out of breath) Wow. Everything is fine, but that was definitely something else.

__
Thank you for listening. Interference is an Orc Zone production. For more information, or to get in touch, head to orczone.com, or hit us up on Twitter @theorczone. If you would like to support this show, you should check out our patreon page, and/or our teepublic page. Links can be found in the show notes.

We produce two other shows Leaf Us Alone, where we talk about Books and Tea and Legends of Chel a D&D 5th edition podcast set in Geneva’s world.

Finally, as always, we thank Jahzzar for the use of their song “Please Listen Carefully,” available at betterwithmusic.com.